What Weird Shit Are You Seeing Outside?

Illustration for article titled What Weird Shit Are You Seeing Outside?

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While lockdowns remain in effect in many states, health officials still say outdoor exercise is a good way to stretch those legs and shake off some cabin fever. I’ve been religiously walking and running—while maintaining the appropriate distance, of course—and so have plenty of other folks in good ol’ New York. And, lately, it seems that people have started getting weird.

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I’m not talking about the aggro passersby who feel the need to get in strangers’ faces about mask etiquette. (Though there’s plenty of evidence that masks are becoming a primary point of contention.) I mean otherwise normal people who have started doing weird shit outside because being cooped up all the time is doing something to their brains.

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During a long walk the other week, I happened upon a row of parked Citi Bikes. A woman sat on one of them decked out in full athleisure gear. At first, I thought she had just mounted the bike and was about to take it out for a ride. But upon closer inspection, she was actually pedaling furiously in reverse. Occasionally, she’d whip her head back and forth like she was jamming out. That’s when I noticed she had earbuds in and was listening to something on her phone. This genius woman had turned a parked Citi Bike into a free Peloton.

The Citi Bike Rock Out isn’t the only odd behavior I’ve seen on my walks and runs. I also watched a man in a full three-piece business suit doing donuts on a Segway by himself in an empty park plaza. Then there was the granny walking her dog with a fairly large American flag in her hand. As soon as it hit 7 p.m., she started marching in a circle, pumping the flag up and down as neighbors clapped for healthcare workers. Her dog was less enthused.

I can’t be the only person who’s witnessed people slowly losing their marbles in new and inventive ways. Surely, some of you have also seen things that have stopped you dead in your tracks, wondering if we’re going to come out of this weirdly transformed. Maybe you’ve even seen displays of human ingenuity that put Citi Bike Lady to shame. In any case, tell us your best stories in the comments below.